“Fab Five Freddie told me everybody’s high, DJ’s spinnin’ are savin’ my mind, Flash is fast, Flash is cool, Francois sez fas, Flashe’ no do…” – Blondie

Sorry, “Rapture” by Blondie has been stuck in my head all day for some reason (and now it’s probably stuck in yours!  You’re welcome…).

That’s the beginning of the rap break.  Aside from not wanting to bore you or waste space with the entire verse, it also gets MUCH stranger after those first few lines!

If you’re never heard this old song before, everything somehow leads to a Martian eating cars in a parking lot.  Huh?  Yeah, I know…

I have no idea what Blondie was on when she wrote this song, but hey, I want some too!

Anyway, Boom Bish!  The Phoenix has risen!

No, no, I’m not moving again.  Although I did live in Phoenix for a year. 

It was actually really nice out there too, especially the 24-hour burrito stands! 

Shout out to Isabella at Filibertos in Glendale who used to give me extra tacos whenever I let her touch my muscles back in the day!

Yes, you read that correctly.  I pimped myself out for $2 street tacos! 

I also had a similar arrangement at both the McDonald’s and KFC on Easton Ave in Somerset, NJ before I moved to The Grand Canyon State. 

Hey, times are hard my friends.

Ooh, speaking of fast food, I also really miss Jack in the Box restaurants!  If anyone reading this can dropship me a Sourdough Jack with curly fries, I’d greatly appreciate it.  Thanks!

Ah, the memories.  My days back in Phoenix were great!

Fun Fact:  Did you know that it’s illegal to shoot or pee on a cactus in Arizona?  Don’t ask me how I know…

Anyway, “the Phoenix” I was referring to is me.  As in “rising like a” since I’ve finally dug myself out of the miserable cold and flu symptoms described last post. 

…well, for the most part.  My energy is still a bit off and I have to blow my nose every 15 minutes but aside from that, I’m good to go!

In the meantime, I’ve had plenty of time to catch up on A LOT of TV.  You can still see my butt imprint on the couch since I haven’t ventured out much this past week.

As mentioned last post, I don’t have Netflix, but I did catch the R. Kelly documentary (speaking of peeing on things) and a weird alien UFO marathon on The History channel over the weekend. 

The 20/20 special about the Lorena Bobbitt case from the early 90’s is currently playing in the background as I type this. 

If you’re familiar with the case, you’ll probably understand why bangers and mash (sausage and mashed potatoes) may not have been the best choice for my lunch today…

Anyway, now that I’m feeling better, it’s time to get back to the gym!

I don’t really make resolutions since I never feel the need to wait until January to set goals, but I definitely need to get back on the wagon now that the holidays are over.

Fortunately, my brother and sister-in-law provided me with a couple of great new tees for Christmas that should serve as wonderful reminders.

This first one will help me remember to eat more fiber…

I know, classy eh? 

Seriously though, with all the antibiotics I’ve taken lately, pre and probiotics are a great way to offset their effects and restore my gut health. 

Aside from a daily regimen, I may also kick things off with a detox cleanse.  So, if you see me out and about for the next few days, I wouldn’t walk too close unless it’s windy outside…if you know what I’m saying.  😉

This next one isn’t necessarily a reminder, but it is funny!

Hilarious right?!

Besides, you can’t wear an obnoxious shirt like this unless you actually workout, so if nothing else, this will serve as motivation to go to the gym!

Speaking of gyms, I had the pleasure of attending the grand opening of my buddy Alex Yeremenko’s new gym, Dropkick Fitness in Alpharetta, GA over the weekend.

It’s a state of the art Muay Thai and kickboxing studio that also has daycare and kid’s classes!  The name is also pretty badass.  If you’re in the area, definitely check them out!

It’s always great to mix things up so I plan to drop by for a few classes soon too!  Once I can fully breath through my nose…

Oh yeah, and while I’m giving shoutouts, my fellow Atlanta Hawks Flight Crew member, DJ Anthony “Showtime” Mosley hooked me up with an incredible Soca/Reggae playlist the other day!

If you’re a regular here, you know I love Caribbean music and culture, so my workouts have been on 10 ever since he passed this mix along!

If you’d like to hear for yourself, you can check out his SoundCloud by clicking here!  

If you’re a DJ and have a fitness playlist you’d like to share, comment below or DM me on social media by clicking the logos on the main menu.  All styles are welcome!

Before we move on, here’s one more dumb tee for you!  This one has nothing to do with the gym, but who cares?  Look!

Man I miss that place!  Those Red Box kiosks give me anxiety, especially on a busy Friday night when people are literally breathing on the back of your neck as you try and make your selections!

I always liked grazing the aisles at Blockbuster.  Plus the selection was better and you could buy the movies for like $5.

Ah, I miss that place.  RIP Blockbuster.  You’re surely missed.  Also please give my regards to Steak and Ale up there in bankrupt franchise heaven. ☹

So, this is where I was going to review the 2 new Oreo flavors, Dark Chocolate and Carrot Cake but they were sold out at all 5 stores I tried.

I suppose that’s for the best since I literally opened this post with a declaration to restore my body to factory settings!

Perhaps they’ll be in stock before my next cheat day.  I guess I can behave until then.

In the meantime, here’s a review of another fun-filled sugary snack courtesy of my friend and #DoubleFML correspondent Melissa Hodgens.

I had no idea Hostess rolled out a powdered sugar donut cereal recently but behold!

So how are they?  Let’s find out… 

Take it away Melissa!

“I totally expected a Cap’n Crunch texture that was going to murder the roof of my mouth, but instead they had a crunchy yet soft powdery one. They nailed this one on the taste!” – Melissa Hodgens

Whoa!  Sounds good to me!

She also has a Pop Tart cereal she’s waiting to open as well so I’ll pass along her review as soon as she tries them!

Do you have another food item, restaurant or recipe we should all try?  Tell us in the comments below!  Also join our Facebook foodie group, Phenomnomnomenal, by clicking here NOW!

Speaking of recipes, before we close this out, here are a few tea recipes (courtesy of The Indian Spot) to knock out your cold symptoms if your week has been anything like mine!

Great stuff, right?  These teas should make those sore vocals chords hum again asap (Hum-tea… See what I did there?)!

If you have your own remedies, by all means, share them below!

Okay, DJ, cue the music!

Today’s Soundtrack

Rapture – Blondie

Rinse & Repeat – Riton ft. Kahlo

ZeZe – Kodak Black ft. Travis Scott and Offset

Taki Taki  – DJ Snake ft. Selena Gomez, Ozuna and Cardi B

Ganja Tea – Keida

Sunflower – Post Malone ft. Swae Lee

Do you have another song that fits today’s themes or that’s just so great we should check it out anyway?  Tell us in the comments below!

Before we go, let’s check out the “foodie holidays” that happen between this and next post!

Hmm, not the most exciting week but I suppose that’s good since I’m detoxing anyway. 

I may grab a pastrami sandwich on Monday though!  If you remember, they were pardoned from my disgusting foods list back in 2017. 

Hmm, that reminds me, I still need to finally finish that list…

I’ll also need to go shopping for my nephew DJ’s birthday present soon. 

Come on kid!  I just got you stuff for Christmas! 

With my current budget, he might be getting packs of ramen for his birthday this year but we shall see!  

Chicken of Shrimp DJ?

That was a joke but I actually think he’d like that.  You should see this kid eat!  He puts me to shame which is not an easy feat! 

That’s really all I have planned for the week so far aside from the gym and running errands now that I’m no longer confined to my couch.  

I still need to finally watch this Bird Box movie too though…and Aquaman!

Anyway, before you go, please leave a comment!  

If you’re a regular here, you may have also noticed the weekly release date for each post has fluctuated recently.  We’ll probably have a bit of a looser schedule going forward so the best way to keep up with the latest posts is to sign up for our mailing list by registering on the side panel.  You’ll receive an email alert each time we post a new column!

As for this column, that’s a wrap y’all!  Let’s continue the discussion below and on social media!

Thanks again for dropping by and until next time, May the Fork be With You…

-Darrell

MEME DUMP!!! ->