Hey what’s up everybody? Welcome back to #DoubleFML FatDarrellPalooza! And yes, “whiskey, tango, foxtrot” – WTF is up with some of these bizarre stories in my newsfeed right now?
One of the most prominent stories is this Tide Pod Challenge that teens have been doing lately. Have you heard about this? Apparently, teens are daring each other to eat these laundry detergent pods and share the videos of them doing so online. The “joke” is that the pods look just like candy, but the punchline usually ends up with a hospital visit so what’s the point?
I’ve admittedly made some questionable food choices in my life time. I once had a chili dog from a dingy gas station in Amarillo, Texas. I’ve consumed heavily discounted grocery store sushi. I’ve had tap water In Mexico and just last week, I had to be talked out of eating week old Chinese food leftovers (it still made me sad throwing that away ☹).
I was also dumb enough to try super-hot 911 wings to win a bet (I won but my lips were numb, and I couldn’t breathe for about 20 minutes!) and during college, I also thought it would be a great idea to have Taco Bell and White Castle sliders together in the same meal (I ended up cancelling a date that weekend because I couldn’t leave my bathroom!).
So yes, we all make bad decisions at times but never have I once thought about eating packets full of laundry detergent!
I always wondered who inspired some of these ridiculous warning labels I’ve seen over the years. Like the “do not eat warning” on those little silica gel packs inside of sneakers that look like Chiclets Gum (remember that?! Throwback!).
I mean, if you’re over the age of 13 (and even that is pushing it because even my 6-year-old nephew would know better), do we really have to tell you not to eat Tide? Seriously?
You just know that some moronic parent is going to try and file a lawsuit over this though…and they’ll probably win! Remember the clumsy idiot who spilled hot coffee on herself back in the day and successfully sued McDonalds for millions of dollars? Hey, we live in the land of opportunity, right? You too can cash in on being a dummy. All you need is a bad idea a dream…
“Hey, we live in the land of opportunity, right? You too can cash in on being a dummy. All you need is a bad idea a dream… “ – Fat Darrell
I’m pretty sure that the packaging says not to eat them already though, but is this really necessary?
Does everything non-edible need a warning label now? I suppose Dr. Scholl’s will have to ad a “Do not eat” sticker to their gel shoe insoles too since they look a lot like gummy bears…
Admittedly, as a teen I sometimes sniffed this marker that smelled like blueberries but a) it was a scented marker, so it was technically safe and b) (…pay attention, this point is the most important part ->) I didn’t try to actually EAT the marker!
I’m not trying to pick on today’s youth but for a generation raised with smart phones, this Tide pod challenge is pretty dumb. Anyway, yeah, sleep well adults, the future is in good hands!
Speaking of which, allow me to introduce you to Bread Face.
“Huh?” – you.
Bread Face (That’s seriously what she calls herself…I’m not making this up!) is this bizarre woman who also hit my newsfeed this week because she has thousands of people who follow her on social media to watch her literally smash her face into various types of bread. Muffins, croissants, bagels, you name it. Again, I’m not kidding! As ridiculous as this sounds, it’s true! See for yourself…
No, I don’t get it either, but she’s got a huge audience and is actually making money from this! What a time to be alive right?
I personally don’t understand the appeal on either side, but since she seems like she’s having so much fun I decided to give it a shot and….
Nope, this is dumb. Besides, I’d rather bury my face into a slice of pizza (Pizza Face?), a burrito (Burrito Face?) or some nachos (Nacho Face…ha, I like that one). But hey, more power to her. Get that money girl. Have no fear, Bread Face is here!
Once again, the future is in good hands…
Speaking of fear, another WTF story from the past few days was the emergency nuclear missile warning that a government official accidentally set off in Hawaii last week causing mass hysteria! Worst of all, it took officials nearly 40 minutes to announce that it was an accident, so people were literally in full panic mode!
Wow, and Steve Harvey thought he screwed up when he announced the wrong pageant winner! How do you just apologize for causing people to literally fear for their lives?
“Whoops, our bad, Mahalo!” – The Hawaii Emergency Management Agency
I know Hawaiians are known for being laid back and chill but that situation would rattle just about anyone!
I wonder how many people confessed their deepest, darkest secrets or told off their boss and quit since they thought it was possibly their last day on Earth though. That must have been really awkward after the error was announced!
They’d have to crawl back into the office like “Hey, remember when I called you a fat, lazy incompetent imbecile? Then I flipped that desk over and told you to take this crap job and shove it? Well um, yeah my bad, Mahalo!”
Thankfully, everyone I know there is safe. Actually, a few of them were probably too high to notice anyway…
Anyway, if you were confused by the title of today’s post, those 3 words are a part of the The International Radiotelephony Spelling Alphabet or the NATO phonetic alphabet.
The 26 code words in the International phonetic alphabet are assigned to the 26 letters of the English alphabet in alphabetical order as follows: Alfa, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, Echo, Foxtrot, Golf, Hotel, India, Juliett, Kilo, Lima, Mike, November, Oscar, Papa, Quebec, Romeo, Sierra, Tango, Uniform, Victor, Whiskey, X-ray, Yankee, Zulu.
So, my name (Darrell) for example, would be Delta Alfa Romeo Romeo Echo Lima Lima (what’s yours? Comment below!).
It was originally used by the military during World War 2. The purpose was to be able to spell words containing letters that might sound similar over a phone or radio like d and b, m and n, etc. to avoid confusion.
Of course, a lot of customer service reps also use this to verify names. Some of these operators crack me up though because they get so into it while rattling off the phonetic letters over the phone!
That happened just this morning with this lady I spoke to about my credit card payment. Everything else she said was soft and super sweet but once she broke out the spelling look out everybody! She went into full Drill Sergeant mode!
Oooh Chase Bank lady, you’re such a badass with your cool alphabet!
I suppose it does feel empowering firing off military acronyms as you sip that pumpkin spice latte on your desk. It still makes me laugh though.
Oh yeah, speaking of the military – check out these tactical sneakers I got for Christmas!
I know, Oscar Mike Golf (OMG) right?!
Traditional “sneaker heads” might not understand these since they’re not Jordans but any police officers, FBI Agents or military troops reading this will recognize how truly awesome these are!
These are Rangers from 5.11 Tactical. Not only do they look great, they’re light, have amazing traction on any surface and they’re surprisingly comfortable!
Although I’ve mostly been wearing them at the gym, it’s good to know that if Georgia also screws up and sends out a false emergency missile attack warning too, I’ll be ready to go in a moment’s notice…
And while we’re doing this mini-fashion show, here’s a quick red carpet shot from the entertainment industry mixer that I attended at XXI Century Studios in Norcross, GA last Thursday.
It was a great time and I made a lot of amazing contacts. I’ll also have to find out who handled the catering because the buffet was actually pretty incredible!
I was trying not to be “that guy” by eating half of the food but like Popeye always says, “I Yam What I Yam and Dat’s What I Yam.”
I was smart about it though because this woman on the other side of the table had her back turned so I kept sliding my empty plates in front of her so that it looked like I actually had a normal portion! Ha, sorry lady…
Anyway, speaking of food, this next item also hit my newsfeed last week so I rushed over to the nearest grocery store to find it immediately! It’s Dessert Hummus from Delighted By Hummus! Yes, you read that correctly, I said Dessert – check it out!
Apparently, it’s even been featured on Shark Tank but I had never heard of it before. Neither did the cashier who rung me out so these must have just hit the store shelves.
The flavors that I spotted were Choc-o-mint, Snickerdoodle, Vanilla Bean and Brownie Batter.
Although all 4 sound delicious, for the sake of this taste test, I grabbed Brownie Batter and Choc-o-mint.
Aside from the fact that their logo features my initials (DB…Delta Bravo!) I was also impressed by the nutrition stats. It’s certified vegan and gluten free and features all natural ingredients! Plus the Choc-o-mint will only set you back 60 calories per serving and the Brownie Batter only 80! Here are the labels, check it out for yourself.
Of course, “healthy” and “delicious” don’t always go together so hopefully these taste just as good as they look!
The packaging recommends eating this either by itself, with fruit, pretzels or graham crackers. Pita chips would probably be another great idea. Anyway, I decided to cut up some apples and give it a try.
So how did it taste? WOW! Absolutely incredible is how it tasted! Both of them were ridiculously good! They’re also surprisingly filling. At first I felt that the $4.99 sticker price was a bit high (the store that I got them from is pricey anyway though so it was most likely marked up) but these flavors more than justify the cost!
Chocolate and hummus aren’t words that normally go together but after these first 2 samples, I’m definitely a believer. They really nailed the flavor palette and with all natural ingredients! Sorry for all of the exclamation points here but I’m literally blown away by this product. I’ll definitely have to go back and try the other 2 flavors now. This will be a great way to satisfy my sweet tooth in between cheat meals. Awesome stuff.
Here’s a link to their blog since it has recipes that you can make using their hummus but obviously you can also click around to learn more about the product and where you can find it locally: https://delightedbyhummus.com/blogs/news
Before we move on though, let’s take a closer look at that shirt, shall we?
Cuz I’m “Street Smart”…
Yes, I know, I’m a bit immature at times but hey, at least I don’t eat laundry detergent pods so I have that going for me.
Anyway, healthy and delicious stuff right? But my entire trip to the store wasn’t quite as nutritious or disciplined because I passed these chips on the way to the register and was intrigued.
Hmm, in hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have posted a pic of me wearing a monkey on my shirt this week, H&M might try and use me for their next ad campaign…
Anyway, I’ve never heard of these weird flavors before (or this company for that matter). Tangy Pickle BBQ? Dill Pickle? Dilly Dilly! Count me in!
As for the taste? The Dill Pickle ones basically taste like salt and vinegar potato chips. They’re not bad but they definitely do not taste like pickles.
The Tangy Pickle BBQ flavor was interesting though because it tasted like someone dumped BBQ and salt and vinegar chips into a bag and shook it up to combine the flavors. Again, they’re not bad but not as ground breaking as I expected.
If Frito Lay were to attempt these flavors, I’m sure they’d nail them. If you remember back to my review of those Crispy Taco chips, I couldn’t put the bag down! They literally nailed every individual ingredient and it tasted exactly like the description.
This Golden Flake Snack Foods brand is apparently a southern chain. They made a valiant attempt but when it comes to weird new flavors, I’ll just stick to Lays potato chips next time. There’s a reason why their motto is “you can’t eat just one.” I’m a believer.
Do you have another food item, restaurant or recipe we should all try out? Tell us about it in the comment below! Also make sure to join our foodie group, Phenomnomnomenal, on Facebook by clicking here!
The reason why I got so excited about the hummus having all natural ingredients is because genetically modified foods are harder for your body to process and the long-term effects could possibly be harmful. In moderation, I’ll still eat those chips that I also bought but as a go-to snack for the majority of the week, the hummus is the much smarter option.
Ideally you want to stick to the outer perimeter of the grocery store where meats and produce can be found. Those center aisles are where bad choices like my aforementioned chips and soda can be found so the less items purchased from those aisles, the better!
To help stay focused, don’t go to the store hungry when you’re likely to give in to your cravings. Also make a list of the items that you need so that you won’t end up wandering aimlessly down the aisles where you’ll be tempted. Some stores even have a click and pick-up service where you can select and pay for all of your items online, then just show up at the store to pick them up!
Yes, I am the creator of a crazy sandwich and I talk about Oreos and other fun foods each post but know that those items are not consumed every day so have your fun in moderation and stick to all-natural, healthy ingredients as often as possible for the rest of the week.
Do you have a fitness question or accomplishment you’d like to share? Tell us about it in the comments below!
WTF (Where They From) – Missy Elliot ft Pharrell (Whiskey Tango Foxtrot)
Filthy – Justin Timberlake (I’m really looking forward to his Superbowl halftime performance!)
Motor Sport – Migos ft Nicki Minaj and Cardi B
Bad at Love – Halsey
Do you have another song that fits today’s themes or that’s just so great we should check it out anyway? Tell us about it in the comments below!
Okay everyone, hopefully most of you have a short work week since Monday was Martin Luther King Day. Even if you still had to work, hopefully you at least took a brief moment to reflect on his historic contributions to society.
Without the work of Dr. King and other civil rights leaders of his era, you might not be reading this blog right now!
Instead, I could have possibly been stuck working on some hot, sweaty plantation without the right to vote (that right was only granted in 1965….only 53 years ago!) or eat in certain restaurants.
I know that controversial Alabama politician, Roy Moore, publicly stated that America was “great” during slavery (seriously! Look it up…that’s actually more ignorant than eating Tide Pods) but um yeah, no thanks Roy. You can pick your own damn cotton!
“Um yeah, no thanks Roy (Moore). You can pick your own damn cotton!” – Fat Darrell
Anyway, enough about that! We don’t discuss politics here. But I am thankful for the sacrifices that were made to provide me with many of the freedoms that I enjoy today.
My friends, family and lifestyle would be much different had the Civil Rights movement never taken place.
We’ve come a long way as a society but we still have a long way to go so like Dr. King said, “keep the dream alive.”
Okay, that about does it for this week but you know that I’m not going to let you leave without reminding you to drop a comment below! Also follow me on social media by clicking on the logos that can be found on the side panel.
Also check out our #DoubleFML Deals and Discounts page for some amazing savings at some great online retailers!
With that said, I’m about to go eat the rest of that hummus! Hey, I Yam who I Yam remember? #yolo
Whatever you get into this week, I hope that it’s incredible! Now go out there and be awesome. You’ve got this!😉
Until next time my friends, May the Fork be With You…
“I know the voices aren’t real, but man do they come up with some great ideas…”